do random thoughts make good comics?

comic to be titled: how am i supposed to have any hope for the human race?

panel one: i dyed my hair blonde once
panel two: country singers invited me to their motel rooms
panel three: boys fought each other to walk me home
panel four: it wasn’t even that good of a dye job

here is my efforts to turn random thoughts into an art form.
does it work?
at least it keeps me entertained….

note…only one country singer invited me to come to his motel room

now i get it

when i was a girl, i could not get enough of horse stories. i picked up john steinbeck’s the red pony
expecting just another heartwarming story of a boy & his horse…by the end of the book, i was
pissed off & utterly confused. i remember the book from time to time, with bitterness. however,
while proofing my upcoming collection of short stories, i found myself remembering the story
with a different reaction. my own abrupt and morose storytelling reminded me of john steinbeck &
that fucking pony. then i began to wonder how much i had internalized in those precocious early
years, reading books beyond my understanding, stephan king & edgar allan poe…now building blocks
to my own stories. men i have never met, corrupting & molding that little writer inside me….

my dickie

i call my hairstyle
“the dickie”
it looks like i am wearing a full head of hair
but
i am not.

just a goofy thought put into my art journal. i like the inking of me.
mostly i am freaking out about my new house these days. does anyone have thoughts on alternative energy in regards to heating…& water heaters? (just in time for earth day!)
i am making this house from scratch it seems, & i don’t want to follow the recipe.

somewhere in time

embracing time
as a fluid thing
that moves through me
& around me
& back again
so i can be old me
with old you
but also be
a me
that knows better.

random thoughts as i navigate my broken heart. i have been doing a lot of navigating of said heart in the past week. there will be some dark posts upcoming as i figure stuff out….

housekeeping

i’m going to hire
a serial
killer
to clean my house
because surely
they would be
good
at neutralizing
sterilizing
the crime scene
that is my home.

just a random thought. they usually happen when i’m alone & having a good conversation with myself.
i’m not happy with the inking…but, again, it was experimental…& has nothing to do with the verse….

room with a view

baby
it’s cold outside
yet the birds 
that flutter outside my window 
as i write & draw & dream
don’t seem 
to even know 
i saw a hawk take one out 
the other day 
a streak of brown 
in a white background
and dinner was served 
today 
a vole runs back & forth 
across the snow 
gathering the sunflower seeds 
i threw 
to the juncos
such
determination
& my
undying
admiration.

i get excited whenever i take a selfie that doesn’t look like crap…so, here’s an ink-free self-portrait.

random thoughts on the last day of summer

holy fricking christ that’s a cute puppy, right?

i know, i know, you are all like, but aren’t you kind of overwhelmed as it is, emje? do you really want to be getting a puppy right now?
well…you know…want vs. need. oh my god, i need a puppy!
look how cute she is!
i am due to adopt her next week. she is a cattle dog. my very most favorite breed. i remember the first time i ever saw cattle dogs, & it was love at first sight.
(who has noticed that moses jones has a cattle dog?)
i tried adopting adult dogs, but they were not socialized to our life. it is so so hard to find an adult dog socialized to being around kids & livestock & country roads, etc. i know dog socialization. I know dog training. i can do this.
it might even be good for me?

meanwhile, fall equinox tomorrow! at last! balance! the caterpillars & i shared a crop of basil just now. my garden still grows despite my neglect.

also!
today in the mail i got jars & jars of salmon in exchange for an inking i did. i feel like the luckiest artist in the world! once i got texas pecans for a zine & now i get alaskan salmon for an inking.
i feel so successful & loved right now.

and i started a new page of moses jones & i think i finally got the art the way i want it!! after only a bajillion pages.

meanwhile, i am goofing off on okcupid again–which is always strangely flattering & bizarre in a fun way…and meeting cute local farmer boys through my selling livestock on craigslist.
and it’s finally fall, y’all.

it’s a beautiful day.
(& i’m getting a puppy next week!!)

random dreams….

this morning, before i woke up, i had a dream about hamlet, our turkey.
in the dream he could talk & sounded like “strax” from doctor who (which is how i have always suspected he would sound if he talked.)

in my dream someone who hamlet did not like was visiting so he ran up with his head super red and called the guy a “motherfucker.”
then i turned to my kids and said, “who taught hamlet to say ‘motherfucker’?”

which is exactly what would happen in real life
if we had a talking turkey.

(another glimpse into my parenting skills)

random thoughts II

y’all should know, random thoughts posts are more likely to happen if i’ve had a beer or two…. i like beer. IPA if you are thinking of sending me some. flying dog‘s raging bitch is my current favorite for many reasons ranging from name to taste to label artwork….

but i digress.

last night i was watering the livestock (so i don’t have to do it in the morning when i am just fucking sleepy & not eager to do extra work) when fidgit & iggy attacked me with water balloons. i was armed with the hose while they launched their attack. i got two water balloons to the head & felt mostly proud that my son had such good aim. soon misha was on the side of her brothers, armed with water balloons…i think she may have been their patsy, while poppy was on my side, taking his turn with the hose when i resorted to chasing them with buckets full of water intended for tomorrow goats. he stood his ground & was my little braveheart with his mad hose skills.

it was crazy fun. a twilight game of war. something that happens when the planets are aligned & everyone is in just the right mood & no one storms off, pissed off, screaming that they hate so & so and vowing that we will all rue the day. instead, we had fun. instead, we were a family.
enough to keep my faith that everything could turn out okay.

i started writing down my random thoughts after last time when i had forgotten them all. these are the thoughts that aren’t quite important enough, coherent enough, “poetic” enough to qualify for an entire art journal page…but thoughts that i long to share nonetheless.

random thoughts:

*i am living by a different set of instincts than the general public. i question the instincts most give in to (consume consume consume) while i honor the ones most people push away in order to follow the mob mentality.

*i’m so sexy when i’m drunk

*having a clean house is grossly over-rated. i kick myself for not house-keeping up with the joneses…but my spiders are so so happy.

*i really don’t have to look for a reason to drink

*note to self: keep poppy away from babies

*i’ve decided that mowing the lawn is also very over-rated

*note to self: keep all knives out of poppy’s reach.

these are random things i write down in my journal as they tromple through my brain. things i would post on facebook or twitter if i were a fan of social media sites rather than having a healthy fear of them. these are things that make me giggle or feel “special.”

thank you for listening.
on to our regularly scheduled navel-gazing art-journaling.

random thoughts

i am not on facebook or twitter anymore because i always feel i am spitting into an ocean… (though i did just find out that my facebook accounts have remained up despite my deactivating them last spring. i deactivated again…but if someone sees they are still up, please let me know.)

i have random thoughts throughout the day.
i am single & rural & in the company of children.
if these random thoughts are not “art journal worthy” they just waft away with the wind….

like…
“i think i’m just going to have another beer & be sad.”
now i can’t remember any other random thoughts…maybe because of the one beer i did have.
but here’s a hypothetical for y’all. say a super cute, very cool guy contacted you via okcupid. he was what you were advertising for: an artist farmer.
so he contacts you & you message back & forth & seem to have a lot in common & possibly some chemistry….. then he gives you his contact information (website, phone number, & instagram) & he deactivates his okcupid account.
so you go to his website & you message him.
& wait
& wait
& he messages back that he is very busy but thinks your artwork is great & smiley face.
& that is the last you hear from him

is that it? is it over? i am not great with relationships (what? no!) and i am a bit socially retarded (impossible!)
crap.
that was it, wasn’t it? something didn’t click after all? maybe i’m too crazy? or i have four kids? or he found the perfect woman for him in between messages to me?

this is impossible. dating is for sadists…& the masochists who love them.
i am going to have that second beer.
fuck it all anyway.

ps. i went outside to put away goats & ducks & chickens & geese & hamlet the turkey and now i feel a bit less morose…but i still might have beer & watch a tragically romantic movie.

pss. does anyone else get a little sad when they post something they think is smashing & it gets lukewarm response?

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