everyday magic

i haven’t journaled in a few days…i have been relatively angst-free…. but i expect i will be journaling more soon about issues with dusty & my touch & go attempts at reuniting.

but, in this moment of relative peace & calm…here’s to everyday magic.

more martyr than saint

my mom used to say, “it takes a saint to live with a martyr.” she had a bunch of fun sayings.
“people in hell want ice water”
“the road to hell is paved with good intentions”
this one, the martyr/saint one, was usually directed at my paternal grandmother….

any hoo!
this thought was about my own children. that they drive me to the brink of darkness, but then are the one thing that gives me a reason to smile again.
funny how that works.
those things we love can really torture us.

greeting cards from hell

this one is from that day when everything went dark…so so dark…when dealing with relations between dusty & me.

i am talking about the future of our relationship, not the future in general…except for when i am talking about the future in general…which, most the time, i am not.

two worlds

this is something i have maybe always been struggling with… the idea of being a mom & the idea of being in a relationship. thanks to my own parents fucked up relationship, i seem unable to consolidate the idea of parenting with the idea of partnership.
so…trying to build some bridges.

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