my quixotic heart

ridiculous
or noble
these feelings i have for you
what if
you are the only
one
i can open my heart for
what if
you never walk through
that door
is that a truth i am willing
to accept
does that make me a fool?
i will be the first
to laugh
at me
the first to mock
my homemade pain
but my heart
is true
ridiculous
& noble.

i pulled the coyote card yesterday when reading medicine cards. friday night, i got home after one in the morning from dropping off my kids, and when i got out of my car, the coyotes were screaming. the next night, when i laid down to bed, they started up again.
screaming
laughing
that crazy noise they make.
the coyote medicine card is a prankster card. a card that talks of being the butt of a joke.
i am a joke.
i know this.
my ridiculous feelings for someone i lost almost thirty years ago.
truly quixotic.
i am living up to my name.

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4 thoughts on “my quixotic heart

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  1. I’ve forgotten in what story a character referred to his gods as “The Lords Of Cosmic Jest”. as, I suppose, Tricksters all.

    When we hear he Trickster laugh
    Absurdity proclaimed
    Time could it be
    If best to laugh with him
    Join the pack
    Sing with the coyotes

    Liked by 1 person

    1. i am finding i am pretty comfortable with being a joke. strangely, it does not bother me. i just need to make sure everyone is aware that i am aware of my status as a fool 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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