coffin of change

how long have i been
trapped
in this cocoon
it is moot to wonder
who put me in here
no one person
did
but here i am
a coffin of change
my wings
growing in
are trapped
unable to fly
not quite
ready
to fly
but first
how do i get
out?
removing layer
after layer
sometimes clawing
as if for my very
life
sometimes
coaxing & caressing….
is that sunshine
i see?
a light?
can i feel a breeze…?

regarding the illustration, i have been asked to play with the image of the ardhanarishvara, a hindu composite of a god & a goddess. both the male & the female.
i had a bit of a challenge doing this, as i realized how feminine my men are & how masculine my women are. but a lot of the traditional representations of the ardhanarishvara are similar in their androgyny.
i have a lot of experience with feeling both an internal male energy alongside my female energy & feel very androgynous.
it used to be my male was the dominant one, but little by little my inner goddess is making herself heard.

regarding the verse…this is where i am. i’m not sure how long i have been here. i feel like it has been a long time. i am hoping to find my way out & into a transformation soon….

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