hotel california

the drone of the fans
in the basement
will hopefully help me sleep
’cause last night
i was awake
or fitfully sleeping
twisting & turning
as water
crept & dripped into my basement
gallons of water
absorbed into
powder
fucking
blue
carpet…
i used to call this place
bullfrog song
now i call it
hotel california
i just want to be
anywhere
but
here
but road trips detoured
by leaky
basements….

i was totally going to go to iowa & look for a place to live. however! water coming in through a wall dumping gallons onto the floor despite the floor drain just feet away….
this place is a fucking nightmare.
& my mom is pissed that my dad died first & left her to deal with it.
& i’m pissed that i got tricked into living here by siblings that wanted to live footloose & fancy free far away from familial home….
added to my list of things i never wanted to do alone: deal with a flooded basement.

i am brain dead.
all i can do is watch ryan renolds movies, drink beer, & wander to the basement on occasion to bail out this sinking ship….

fuck me.

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13 thoughts on “hotel california

    1. it’s my mom’s house. i won’t have to pay for anything to be fixed. one of the perks of squatting,
      but that doesn’t stop my being anxious & stressed out about it.

      Like

  1. ohhh i wish we could get a place together! i hope you can get that fixed or find a place that is wayy better, that stuff can get moldy and mold is no joke! It can get you super sick. careful sis!

    Liked by 1 person

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