desperate to be heard

desperate
desperate for adult interaction
desperate to be heard
i share my thoughts with him
only
to have him
wad them up in a ball
& hurl them back at my
head
my heart
my soul
…crash

this may be weird…or maybe not, but whenever i touched my pen to the page to draw the lines of my face, i started crying.
drawing pain.
i used a mirror. i don’t usually use a mirror. but i needed to see where the lines fell.
those lines made me cry.
there is a lot of pain
in the lines of my face.

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Author: emje

i'm a disaster at every type of relationship i enter into...except with my kids. i think i'm doing something right there...but it is difficult to tell sometimes, especially since i have a pretty crappy support system since support involves relationships. i am a pretty dark person with a weird sense of humor. i spend my non-mom time cooking, baking, homesteading, fermenting, planting, sprouting, experimenting, reading, writing, drawing, plotting, obsessing, and hiding. as a mom i am about as unconventional as i can get. i unschool my kids & give them a lot of freedom to be who they are. this does not help my popularity. but my kids are super cool. i love my kids.

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