pixie

i got several text messages from my ex-husband today. he is lost and wants me to find him.

he started out asking if we had snow. we don’t. he does. “is that different from when you were a kid?” he asks about my snowless winter. he knows i worry about climate change. his question is a question about that. instead of comforting me, he likes to provoke my fears.

but i’m really not in the mood. not anymore.

“doom & gloom” i text back to him. he thinks i am referring to myself. i let him know that i feel he is always trying to get me to think about the worst.
i let him know i am done thinking about the worst.
& i am done with him.

he tells me he wants to be my ally.
i ask, why, he never has been before.

he tells me he wants to support my dreams.

he tells me he has been doing crunches.

after awhile i stop answering his texts. after i tell him that there are so many things wrong with the world that all i can do is to choose to be happy.

i am happy. strangely enough.

i am happy.

 

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Author: emje

i'm a disaster at every type of relationship i enter into...except with my kids. i think i'm doing something right there...but it is difficult to tell sometimes, especially since i have a pretty crappy support system since support involves relationships. i am a pretty dark person with a weird sense of humor. i spend my non-mom time cooking, baking, homesteading, fermenting, planting, sprouting, experimenting, reading, writing, drawing, plotting, obsessing, and hiding. as a mom i am about as unconventional as i can get. i unschool my kids & give them a lot of freedom to be who they are. this does not help my popularity. but my kids are super cool. i love my kids.

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