fly away

so many of my drawings
i want to name “escape”
only to realize that i’ve already
named a drawing that
why am i so often
thinking of escape?

i have this ex-husband
who emails every once in awhile
all flirty and remorseful
wishing he hadn’t
wished me away
even proposing marriage
once more.
but the minute i say
“where was this love
when you had me?”
he disappears again
saying,
“i will bother you no more.”

until the next time
he is filled with flirty remorse
i suppose.

i have this ex-husband
who likes to lie in wait
like a lion watching for a limping
deer
he waits for me to weaken
and pounces
all big blue eyes
and intense energy.
devouring my heart
my soul
and leaving me
empty.

i have to die inside
to push him away
because he is an
infestation.

i am angry
so angry at these two men
so fucking pissed off.
i am sport to them
but they want to call it
love.